An Italian in London: could you pass an English placement test?

An Italian in London: could you pass an English placement test?

When you are living in a foreign country, all of a sudden you become a sort of an expat agency for other people, and you find yourself answering ridiculous question like: “My friend is coming to London, is there any chance you can find him a job?” Or: “I am moving to London, can I stay at yours for a couple of days? Do you know anyone who has a spare room?”

So I had an idea to avoid all this questions: set up an English placement test. Not the usual English placement test to establish your level of English, but something more like a test to see if you are prepared for life in the UK. Living in the UK is not always as easy as it seems.

Let’s start with some basic test questions:

Question number one: Can you survive drinking without eating?

In England the drinking culture is slightly different to other countries. The English love going for a drink just a little bit more than going for a meal. So when you go out with your new colleagues, or your new boyfriend/girlfriend, or simply just your friends, be prepared for lots of drinks – alcoholic or non-alcoholic.

Question number two: Are you able to adapt to tough situations?

Which develops into further questions: Are you fully aware that houses in England are cold? And that it rains a lot? And that there are no sockets in bathrooms so you have to dry your hair in the living room?

Question number three: Are you ready to plan ahead?

English people are very organised and want to plan everything ahead. They will start planning holidays a year ahead, plan coffee breaks months in advance, and they will want to book restaurants weeks ahead of time.

If you answered “Yes” to all of these questions, and won’t flinch when one cold, mid-March morning someone asks you about your New Year’s plans, you have passed the placement test with the best score possible. You are now ready to live in the UK.

So, do you have a spare room?

image: ell brown 

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